The topic of values is one of my favorite topics. This is because, as a transformational life coach, across the board I see that to the degree that our values are present in our lives, we feel more fulfilled, at peace, energized, able to manage life’s challenges, and willing to take risks. When our values are present in our lives we experience greater health, feel most like ourselves, more aligned, like your needs are met, in the flow and heading towards our full potential. We feel that life is full and meaningful. Design life according to personal values.
The opposite is true as well; to the degree that our values are not present in our lives, we can feel discontentment, higher levels of stress, the feeling that something is missing, feeling that something is missing, meaninglessness, and higher levels of anxiety, reactivity and/or depression.
Our personal values system is unique to each one of us. It is intrinsic, meaning that it comes from within. We know that something is a value to us because we have a reaction when it is present, and when it is absent. When present, our values have the capacity to light us up from the inside out, give us energy, make us feel alive, and make us feel like ourselves.
Some values include connection, adventure, accomplishment, being in nature, physical activity, community, novel experiences, service, creativity, independence, or personal growth. Some values are invisible, meaning that they are already interwoven into our lives. Suppressed values are those which are not being honored in our lives, and obsessive expression of values refers to the values which we over emphasize or take an extreme approach to. For example, if someone is over demanding of respect it might point to a value of respect. This can also point us to where we want our most basic needs of life to be met on an emotional level. ‘Must haves’ refer to things in your life that you know are absolutely necessary for your fulfilment such as fulfilling work, partnership, family, or being in nature to name a few.
It is not that we can suddenly snap our fingers and completely align our lives to our values. However, getting clear on our values, what is most important to us, and what makes us feel most alive will help us to not only make sense of our experience, but also help us to make decisions with more clarity, and move our lives in the direction of living more according to our values.
A values activity:
Take a moment to get comfortable, and take a few deep breaths. Feel free to light a candle or turn on some ambient background music. Think back to a moment or time in your life when things felt right, when all felt aligned. This could be a moment or a period of time in the present or past. Allow yourself to steep in the experience. Notice your posture,
As you think back, notice what values are present in this experience: connection, adventure, accomplishment, being in nature, physical activity, community, novel experiences, service, creativity, independence or freedom, and personal growth, or any others. Then answer the following questions:
- What are must have’s? (Things that you absolutely want or need in your life to feel fulfilled)
- What values are already present in your life?
- What values are not being honored?
- What is one thing you can do today to begin to honor this value more?
I am a life coach for men, women and young adults who are looking to create a deeper relationship with themselves in order to feel more fulfilled in life. If you would like to learn more about your values, or would like help to design your life according to your values, contact me for a session where we will dive in deep and get clear on what your values are! Design life according to personal values.